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Can An Abusive Spouse Change?

January 23, 2020

 

Domestic violence and abuse is, unfortunately, a common problem in Aiken. For people in these situations, making the decision to separate from their spouse or get a divorce is difficult, but often necessary to protect their safety. As an experienced Aiken family law attorney, one of the most common questions clients have in these cases concerns whether their abusive spouse can change. While it is possible, you still need to take the proper precautions.

 

Domestic Abuse: What Are The Chances Your Spouse Will Change?

 

All couples argue occasionally. Disagreements and disputes are common in relationships. However, domestic violence rises to a whole other level. According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, the following are common behaviors on the part of abusers:

 

  • Punching

  • Pushing

  • Hitting

  • Making threats

  • Stalking

  • Hurling insults

  • Damaging property

  • Isolating you from family and friends

  • Acts of sexual harassment and rape

  • Financial abuse (such as limiting your access to funds)

 

For people in this situation, deciding the best course of action can be challenging. In the aftermath of an incident, your partner may be extremely apologetic and vow not to repeat the behavior in the future. But what are the odds the abuse will actually stop? The Hotline advises that domestic violence is likely to continue and even escalate unless the abuser makes the following changes:

 

  • Admits fully to what they have done, without blaming you or making excuses for their behavior

  • Accepts the fact that committing domestic violence is a conscious choice they make

  • Is willing to identify patterns of behavior or attitudes on their part that need to change

  • Does not demand credit for positive changes they make, recognizing that this is how they should have behaved all along

  • Is willing to accept any ramifications of their actions, such as facing criminal charges or having to live away from their home for a period of time

 

Protecting Yourself and Your Children From Domestic Violence

 

While there is a chance that your partner could change, you still need to take steps to protect yourself and your children in case the abuse continues. Even if they appear to be making some progress, a single outburst or incident could put your health and safety in danger.

 

Our Aiken family law attorney can guide you in obtaining protection from domestic abuse. Under the South Carolina Statutes, you may be entitled to a restraining order, which can include provisions regarding the following:

 

  • The right to remain in the family home

  • Protection from having the abuser contact you or appear at your home, work, or public places

  • The rights to certain marital property, such as cars or furnishings

  • The right to spousal support payments

  • Sole custody of your children

  • Required counseling for your spouse and periodic check-ins with the court

 

Contact Us Today for Help

 

At the Surasky Law Firm, LLC, we provide caring support and trusted legal guidance to clients in abusive situations. To discuss how we can help in your case, call or contact our Aiken family law attorney online and schedule a confidential consultation today.

 

 

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